Barb’s Behavior Blog
Stories, Strategies & Inspiration
Last week I shared that rough and tumble play is not challenging behavior per se…
…though, because many early childhood programs forbid this type of play, teachers often relate to it as challenging behavior and then, when we try to stop it, it can escalate to actual challenging behavior.
So, what to do?
First, if you’re going to remind children that it’s not permitted in your classroom make sure to do it in a way that’s neutral and not shaming. But, just as important…
In 2018, at the first Transform Challenging Behavior Online Conference, I had the absolute pleasure of interviewing Mike Huber, author of Embracing Rough and Tumble Play.
WOW did I learn a lot!
These days, MANY (most?) programs don’t allow “rough and tumble play” inside or even outside.
And, it’s no small thing to ask you or your administrators to consider changing that…even though the benefits of rough and tumble play are well researched, well documented, and many.
SO, I won’t ask that of you. (Though I’ve got big respect for anyone who decides to learn more and consider it - administrators and directors: I’m looking at you!)
What I do ask, is that all early childhood educators stop relating to wrestling and rough and tumble play as challenging behavior.
Rough and tumble play, pretend fighting, or wrestling is NOT challenging behavior.
Do you dream of a classroom of children who can self-regulate and calm when they’re upset?
….maybe children even help each other in those hard moments?
Do you wish you and your coworkers – and children’s families – were all on the same page with strategies to support young children who exhibit challenging behavior to learn to self-regulate?
Today’s blog post is for you, if you’re like any of these teachers…
Roxanne, who is concerned about: impulse control.
Meenakshi, who says the children in her class throw things around in the classroom, even their shoes.
Suzie, who reports struggling with grabbing that has now progressed to biting from an autistic child with a learning delay – there is no obvious trigger but transitions can be especially tricky.
Rosemary, who says she sees self-regulation issues when children cannot do exactly what they want, for as long as they want (especially with the iPad).
M. Jimenez, who reports that the behaviors they see are: not following directions, resisting transitions, impulsiveness, hard time with transitions and sharing toys.
Jennifer, who has a child snatching toys, yelling "no" loudly, and hitting/pretend hitting.
Maria, who says she has lots of disrespect in the room. Children who choose not to follow directions or don’t acknowledge a direction being given.
Estela, who says lately children want immediate response to needs and wants and just can't wait.
Which one of those situations do you relate to most?
I think we can all agree that one of the things we most need to teach children who hit, kick, tantrum, or throw things is how to self-regulate.
Children need to learn to self-regulate throughout the day, but especially when they’re upset!
Those children who seem to go from 0-10 in the blink of an eye, flip their lids over the littlest things, or who hurt their peers?
Common wisdom in our early childhood field is that we need to help them learn self-regulation skills.
Yes, other skills are needed. How to recognize and name those big emotions.…how to ask for what they want and need (with words, rather than their hands!)
But first and foremost, I hear teachers looking for strategies to teach self-regulation.
Perhaps you dream of a classroom…
In last blog I said I’d share some examples of how simple yet powerful changes can prevent or quickly de-escalate challenging behaviors.
When we’re on the challenging behavior hamster wheel it's easy to think “nothing is working” and therefore expect that the solution must be complicated.
But, oftentimes nothing could be further from the truth!
What if instead of trying to cajole children to clean up and come to snack we offered them the opportunity to come to the snack table throughout a 1- hour center time?
What if instead of trying to distract or reprimanding young children who want to climb and touch and move we revamped classrooms so they could climb and touch and move throughout the day?
